The BLUGH: June 14, 2023
“A stranger is just a friend you haven’t met.”
The quote above is famous, right? Like, I feel like I’ve heard it a lot and I never knew who said it and I assumed it was Dr. Seuss or Mr. Rogers or the snowman from Rudolph or someone like that because it’s wholesome, you know? Turn out, this quotes’s author is UK novelist, Roy E. Stolworthy. Much like me, he has his own website. While I’ve never read any of his books, I have read his Twitter bio and I will share that with you here: “I Love dogs that wag their tails. Hot mugs of sweet tea and I write thrillers.” So basically this guy invented wholesome as a concept.
But back to the topic at hand!! Making friends with strangers. All my friends were once strangers but not all my strangers became friends. I would say I am fair at the skill of engaging with and making friends with new people. When a stranger talks to me I am typically suspicious or busy or confused. We consider below:
Suspicious: I don’t know the source of my suspiciousness of strangers. I have always been a little wary of a new person talking with me and while it started long before living in NYC, I am sure that living here has heightened it. I mean, duh, be a LITTLE suspicious. Have common sense, but I don’t want to be so suspicious that I miss out on great people.
Busy: I need to be more present and not move so quickly. When out and about, I am so focused on getting where I’m going and living in my own world that I barely see or notice others sometimes.
Confused: In social settings when a stranger, friendly or otherwise, engages with me, I am like…you can see me? FOR REAL, I feel like I can’t believe someone can register me unless they already know who I am. Humans are strange.
On top of all my own hangups, I assume others will also be suspicious or confused if I strike up a friendly conversation and I also basically act like everyone is POTUS and way too busy to talk to lil old me.
I’ve always admired the “golden retriever” people that can just be at ease around people they don’t know, are easily approachable, and never worry about what they will say. I work HARD to be be funny/interesting/chill when I am meeting new people and I am afraid I am emitting my desperation to seem cool. Sometimes, I’ll even start smoking an imaginary cigarette to come off as edgy! It has never worked but I think I’ll keep trying!!!!
I have had luck though. If you’re reading this, you know me and are probably my friend and we used to be strangers. Remember those days? Gosh, we so didn’t know each other back then! Bad times.
😼LEARNING OF THE WEEK: I was looking up what feral means because everyone is name calling these cats feral but what does it mean?! Apparently, “a feral animal is one from a domesticated species that has reverted to living as a wild animal.” Ok, noted. But more importantly, did you know that the Scottish Wildcat, aka HIGHLAND TIGER, is a thing? Or rather, was. They are functionally extinct or hybridized out. Who knew?!😼
PRODUCT RECOMMENDATION
Ready to magically turn strangers into friends? Then let’s get busy. I met one of the kindest people I know in a class (more on this later)! I love a little class. “Adult For Fun and For Learning and For Growing Classes” I have taken include but are not limited to:
French: retained little to nothing.
Lamp making: I can now make a very specific type of lamp.
Dance: also served as a class on memory because damn you have to remember the steps.
Perfume making: Made a very weird perfume.
Bob Ross Painting workshop: many happy accidents filled my canvas.
It’s cute and people are happy to be there because we are choosing to learn about something that interests us. Imagine! Now of COURSE I have gone to a class or two and left quickly thereafter with no one knowing my name. I’m mysterious like that. But it’s lovely to try something new! Here are a few websites for finding classes/activities in your area:
Course Horse (my fav, they have SO many things)
Vimbly (only in major big cities)
CocuSocial (cooking!!)
✨
BOOK RECOMMENDATION
YOUR TURN! Ladies and gentlemen, strangers and friends, what are YOU reading? The end goal is for me to have the library from Beauty and the Beast, so the more books the better. Have a book you think I should check out? I beg🧎, reply to this email and tell me what’s up!!
✨
TIKTOKS
A collection of TikToks to please both strangers and friends 💛
✨
SEPTEMBER 2022
We met in a perfume class
Kat (red head, center, questioning the validity of whatever I’m saying) and I met in a perfume class early 2022 and are now friends!! This is mostly due to Kat who is the master of approaching new people, making them feel at ease, and charming them with her conversation and wit. This pic is from another class we took where we learned about French fashion. It was great because we tried clothes on, and I spilled wine all over a very expensive dress and then we fled.